Charlie The Unicorn!!!

Charlie The Unicorn part 1



Charlie The Unicorn part 2



Charlie The Unicorn part 3

Probably will be offended...

Hope you enjoyed these... I will be posting more as i come across them.

Who's Side are You on?

Kanye West or Patrick Swayze are fighting for attention on Monday. Kanye West apparently didn't like the choice of the MTV Movie Awards going to Taylor Swift and "swiftly" made his way up on stage and "stole" Taylor's moment. Now I don't know what you all think, but I'm beginning to think this was all a big sham! Last time MTV held an awards show, Eminem and Bruno had a similar altercation which made headlines. So I'm just sayin...



Now moving on to a more sensitive subject. Patrick Swayze has lost his long battle with Pancreatic cancer. The problem with this is, I believe that the Kanye/Taylor fiasco got more tweets then this icon's death. That is why this picture is more fitting than anything I can say.

I'm not racist... I voted for Obama!

Well I woulda if I would have been registered to vote. But I feel I voted for him in my heart. Moving on. Tonight was terrible! It all started when this family of color walked into the place of my employment. I say family of color because they had just about all races in their family. Now I have no problem with people of a different ethnicity then me. I have a problem with a person of a different ethnicity than me thinking that I have a problem with them. I have quite a few friends that are not your standard white color and I have quite a few people that I know that are this fleshy white and I can't stands them sons of bitches.

However, tonight it was called to my attention that these two boys, whom will remain raceless, were on the floor. I frantically look over and notice them pushing on each other, or so my racist eyes will fool me. I hastely make my way over to the boys and inform them that horseplay is not allowed in my place of work. If they are caught horseplaying then they will have to exit. Apprently, they did not take too kindly to those words. They went over to their "mother", again im assuming, whom was a different racial tent than the two boys and told her that I was picking on them!

The mother signals for me to come over to her so we can discuss this like two adults. I go to her and she asks me what the problem was. After I tell her my side of the story she, too, tells me that I am picking on her sons. I assure her that this is not the case and that I pick on everyone equally, and she proceeds to tell me "not to be an ass". Also this was said right in front of her young children. Role Model.

This brings me to my point. Could I have turned the tables on this lady and told her that she was picking on me because I was white? Even though she was white too, maybe she had been around the other race long enough to begin to think like them and think that most of America hates black people. I do not hate black people and quite frankly the only person that I believe does hate black people is George Bush and that's only because Kanye West said so! Why is it that every time you get on to a black person in any negatory way they always use the race card.

Sometimes I wish I was black just so I could have that ace on the river to pull out whenever I needed it. That and the repirations would be nice! I can see it now. Aww my great grandfathers daddy was a slave for your grandfathers grandaddy so YOU'Z be givin me money! So in closing if you are of the darker skin tent I have no problem with you. Unless of course you believe I am racist just for doing my job the way I see fit.

Happy September 11th!!

Now I know what you're thinking. "BoB, it's only September 10th!" And you would be correct. Unless you live in China where it could very well be September 11th, or 9th, I'm not really sure what time it is over there. That should be my sub-point. Time should be the same everywhere. What's it matter if the sun is up over here but its not over there. They should just do things at night that we do during the day. Or they should schedule their work and their sleep around the sun and not around the clock. That would make things so much easier in the long run for everyone!

Moving on, September 11th, 2001 was a day that touched everyone in some way. Whether you knew someone that was killed in the towers, you were a fire fighter that went in the tower, or you were like me and rushed to your local gas station to fill up on gas because for some reason you thought that the gas stations were gonna run out of fuel because a plane crashed. Looking back that didn't make any sense at all, but hey I was young and dumb. Either way, September 11th touched you in some way and more than likely you didn't like the way it felt. Kinda like grandpa's dirty corn infested beard when he gives you a kiss, you don't like it, but you have to deal with it.

And deal with it is what we are to do. I propose that September 11th should be a happy day! Not a day of mourning the towers falling, the people dying, or the price of gas skyrocketing! NO! A day of happily remembering all those things. A look back at all the good that has come since that terrible day. I mean, we have liberated Iraq from a cruel and in just ruler. The people over there love us!! We have brought an end to the Taliban in Afghanistan. And ONLY 8 years later we are hot on the trail of the worlds most notorious terrorist. Things are going good.

Edit: Things are really not going that good. Apparently all the people of Iraq do not in fact love us. The Taliban have moved back into Afghanistan, and we still have no idea where that crazed terrorist is hiding.

Irregardless! We have learned to be a more stronger country because of the attacks. We now have a terror alert system. however, I have no idea what to do once it turns red. All in all, I think that a lot of good can come out of making Sept. 11th a national happy holiday. It's already Patriot day, and I don't know about you, but when I think of patriots I think of happy, red, white, and blue mask wearing people supporting the American flag, and jumping around with sparklers. Yeah you see that guy now don't you. Don't he look happy? Yeah that's because he knows that everyone will soon catch on to the fact that September 11th should be a happy day!!

Until then... Stay Happy Blogees!!

And I give to you. A full un-edited version of.......

Drake - So Far Gone (2009)

Where in the world is...

Many people may not know this, but a long long time ago in a land not that far away I used to play a game when I should have been doing school work. This was a game where you searched the entire globe using your gumshoe knowledge to track down the most notorious world criminal using only small clues givin to you by hotel clerks, dock workers, or even bartenders at the New Delhi local sports bar. This was my favorite past time when I was in 7Th grade. I used to play it on a simple computer running measly ol Windows 3.1. I played that game everyday and only caught this criminal once. She was a sneaky little bitch. This game was called: Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego.

After thinking back to this amazing game and how simple it was in theory to find her. I began thinking, Where in the world is Osama Bin Laden? To those of you who don't know who this man is. He's the reason that we are in war in Afghanistan, Iraq, and before you know it, Sudan. He has been blamed for the loss of 2752 American lives on September 11, 2001. He is the leader of Al Queda. He has done all these horrible acts of terrorism against multiple nations, but yet, no one has seen him? How can a man live in "mountain caves" for over almost 8 years and America, the greatest country in the world, can't locate him. I have heard multiple excuses for this and I will list a few and let you decide on the whereabouts of Mr. Laden.

• It has been said that the USA knows exactly where Osama Bin Laden is hiding. We are just using his terror propaganda to manipulate the American people to do what the US government wants them to do
• He is still in the caves in the mountains in Pakistan, we just do not have the technology to find him.
• He's dead. This is the one that I believe is to be the most accurate. I believe he has been dead for a long time now, but no one wants to admit it because we would lose the leverage to continue invading countries "looking for him."
  

These are just a few excuses that I've heard over the years, and I am by all means NOT a political person. I just got to thinking about the fact that it's almost been 9 years and we haven't even found a trace of his white gown that he wears. We found Saddam Husein in a friggin hole in the ground, but yet we have no idea where the FBI's Most wanted Terrorist could be. Come on...

After reading this if you would like some more interesting reading. Try this page 911exposed.org

I do not believe that the American government had anything to do with the attacks on 911, but it has some interesting conspiracy theories

Bitch We Got a Problem

Well it seems that my midnight snack has turned into eggs, toast, and milk.... Sounds healthy enough right? Well I thought so too until I took my morning crap for the past two days and I'll be damned if my shit has turned from a nice and normal brown; to a kind of darkish grassy colored green. Now most people would say that i've eatin too much greens that day, but the problem is I'm on a strict no green diet so therefore, I've had no greens.

This leads me to wonder... Is it my new midnight snack or could i actually be chaning from the inside out to the incredible HULK! Now I know what your thinkin... Adam your a retard, but embrace it for a minute. I have been rather "angry" the past couple weeks/months and if you ask some people years. And doesnt Bruce Banner say "you wouldnt like me when i'm angry" then he changes into the jolly mean green giant. Well I havent actually "hulked" out yet, but I am changing.

Another theory is this... I'm dying. That is less likely outta the two because I feel like i am in the best health of my life. I play basketball till 12:30 in the morning and whoop all those Frankfort losers all day everyday! I eat *cough* healthy... Ok that could be stretching it a bit. Lets just get back to excercise. I excercise vigorously!! So I'm done talking about dying cuz thats just ludicrous talk.

Finally, I could have salmonella, but I dont eat much salmon. =) Apparently, upon further research into the disease it is derived from undercooked eggs... Well huh who'da thunk it? Anyway the symptoms of this disease are diarrhea cha cha cha and green POOP! Although i dont have the other symptoms like a fever or abdominal cramps probably because i take my dose of midol. So I'm all but ruling this out as the cause of my swampy colored excrement.

In conclusion, I will let you, my fellow blogees (I'm tellin you it's gonna catch on), be the doctor and diagnose what you believe could be the problem with me. My personal opinion is that I am slowly changing into the Hulk, based duely on the fact that I have green poop and that I am angered all the time. If you have further questions concerning my well being feel free to comment and I will get back to you promptly....

Neighbors just don't Understand!

I came home from yet another day of grueling work today, and started my shower for a refreshing wash down. I got my ipod all ready, got my clothes all picked out, and got in. I'm jammin along to the latest Eminem diss track "The Warning" when suddenly to my suprise I hear a banging on the wall. I pull back the shower curtain and pause Slim's raps and listen carefully. I hear nothing. I resume my bathing while now listening to him sing about how his mother gave him valium and lots of drugs when I once again hear the banging. Yet again I pull back the curtain, pause the music, and listen closely as my neighbor proceeds to yell at me through the walls. "Turn that awful shit down!" She yelled to my shock!

How could this lady believe that the multi-platinum superstar Eminem aka Marshal Mathers aka Slim Shady aka White Rapper is shit? If more than a million people agree that he is good enough to buy his cd then he cant be shit. Can he? I mean, possibly, if I would have turned on some Jay-Z or maybe even some LiL Wayne she would have liked it better and would not have proceeded to put dents in her walls to yell obcenities about the worlds greatest rapper.

I just do not know anymore. I goto Rap Basement and read all the posts how they say Slim has "fallin off" and "doesn't have it anymore" and I think to myself. Maybe you're tastes have changed. When I was younger I used to love spinich. I wanted to get strong to the finish so I ate's me spinich. Now I can't stand the shit. Maybe that's how people are these days. Their musical taste buds have changed and they no longer like the kind of tones that Mr. Mathers is putting out on his albums. I must be still the same old lame rap listening fan that I was back then, because I still believe Eminem entertains me and I will continue to buy each and every one of his cd's that he puts out.

Now moving back to my neighbor. I respect your opinion on the fact that you think Eminem is shit, and I will try to limit my jamming of Eminem while I take showers from now on. However, I will begin to jam other fine rappers until we find that we can both agree on. If not, we'll just have to agree to disagree!

Download: Eminem - The Warning (Mariah Carey diss)

Halloween 2... The Review

H2 (2009) not to be confused with Halloween II (1981) in anyway. It all starts directly after the first one ends. Laurie Strode is shown strolling down the road covered in blood and carrying the 33 revolver in her hand. She is walking perfectly fine mind you which confuses me later in the movie. Also, I am a bit stumped on how she can just wander through the streets of a town after shooting a man directly in his head! But I digress, I don't want to ruin the plot for anyone who has yet to see the movie, but let me tell you that if you were a fan of the first one. Don't go in expecting the same expectations. Go see the movie by all means, just don't go expecting what we got in the last installment.


The movie, to me, didn't have direction. Which is funny because one of my favorite horror directors, Rob Zombie, directed it. I felt as if Zombie wanted to pile in a bunch of different plots into his movie and fell flat. The death scenes were what we've come to know, but A LOT more brutal. Who knew Michael Myers was such an angry fella? The best part about the whole movie was the makeup. The makeup artists did an amazing job making everyone look really dead or injured. The scene where Laurie was strapped to the gurney was chilling on how real she looked. In another scene a man actually get's his head stomped in and the aftermath was brutal. Not so much the makeup artists job to an extent, but Michael aged a bit in this movie and was sportin a nice 'grizzly adams' look with the long rugged beard which added something new to his character. I am a big fan of gore in my horror movies and this one had it's fair share.

After the amazement of gore and the nostalgia of yet another Halloween movie wears off I began to find myself a little confused at what was taking place. For instance, nobody found it weird that Michael was shot dead on directly in the face and he walked out of an ambulance as if nothing happened. In another scene he walks goes to a party knowing nothing of who was there and proceeds to butcher an innocent girl only to walk back to Laurie's house in search of her yet again. Come on Rob, there's no point in that. Not to lead to much into it, but Michael's mother is in this movie after it being revealed that she had died when he was still a boy in the hospital. Why wasn't she in the first movie after she died?

All in all I did enjoy the move, but not as much as I hoped that I would. It had some grueling, yet redundant, death scenes. It had the most amazing makeup I have scene in a movie in recent years. The main point of the movie I didn't like was the continuity and direction. It seemed as if I was asking myself "How does he know she's there?" or "Why would he do that?" a little too often throughout the movie. I do recommend anyone going to see it as it's a good addition to the horror genre, just don't go with the same expectations as I did.

Out of 10 stars I would give it a 6.5

And now Ladies and Gentleman. For your viewing pleasure I give to you...

Halloween 2 (1981)

Want To Buy: A Midget

Is it wrong for a person to want to own a midget? I like to tell myself that it is not. Yes midgets are people too, but they are darn good workers! I mean have you ever seen a midget get fired? I havent! Owning a midget would be like paying an illegal alien to do your work for you for half the pay. Although you wouldnt really be paying your midget in the financial sense, but the experience we would gain from each other would outweigh what I could pay much more!

The reason I would like to own a midget is simple. It has recently been brought to my attention that I have in fact become a porch monkey. I really dont do anything but sit on my butt all day long. This really hurts the looks of my apartment because quite frankly it's beginging to look messy. I need my little midget helper to pick up around the house, maybe do some dishes, and take out the trash every once in a while. I know this sounds like a lot for the little guy to handle, but dont get me wrong. I'm not a slave driver. Slavery is wrong and I will not partake in any slaverism!!!

My midget would sorta be like a "pet" of sorts. When you have a dog you play with your dog, but you dont want to play with it all the time. After you are done you allow your dog to do what dogs do. That said, instead of playing with my midget he would do his work. After the works done I would allow my midgets to do what midgets do, but im almost certain that its work. This would make us both happy. My house would be clean and my midget would be happy because midgets are always happy!

This brings me to naming my midget. I thought long and hard about this but im going to have to stick with Gordo. Its a catchy name and it just fits for some reason. Now the problem will ensue if Gordo already has a name because that would just be awkward making him change it, but im sure he'll get used to the change. My biggest fear though is when little Gordo finds himself a mate. As i dont want a litter of midgets running around I would have to release Gordo to his new found love and pursue myself a new midget. This will be hard but in time im sure that it will be for the better.

The characteristics im looking for in Gordo are as follows:

Size: Nothing more than 3'11'' and no more than 100lbs (He's gotta be quick)
Age: This is really irrelevent, but I would prefer a younger one
Sex: Defitnitly a male. Female midgets are scary and i'm pretty sure they are biters
Color: I prefer a white one, but if you are in ireland ill pay extra for the green ones

Thats basically it. I've checked around the internet but only came across some that you can borrow. That wont work as you can't name em. So if you have any information about where i may purchase or even adopt (although im not ready for parenthood at this juncture in my life) please feel free to contact me any way you see fit.

Day One. Starting a Blog

Hello Blogee's. Not a word yet but it will catch on. I have decided to move my amazing blogs outside of the wonderful, yet limited, world of Myspace. My blogs are not for everyone. They are actually just for my amusement. I blog about serious things in the world. And I blog about the fact that my poo turns green occasionally. I recommend you subscribe to this blog for it will be the most un-intelligent blog you will read in the coming days. I will also do something crazy never before done in the history of blogging! I will post a compressed image that I have found on the interwebs onto this page. *GASP* So stay tuned as I will surely amaze you with stupidity.